"Love Jesus or Burn Forever in Hell." I first saw this wonderfully encouraging statement emblazoned on the roof of a barn in rural South Carolina. Actually just about where I would expect to find it.
Boy does this little bit of encouragement say reams about the either/or mentality that goes with many fundamentalist teachings. So here is the lesson for the day evidently. EITHER I love Jesus, which I assume means confess him, promote him and do everything he is thought to have said and taught, or burn, not just up, but FOREVER in hell. Whoa moma, what a choice and even better, what a reason to love Jesus! Obey out of sheer fear of annihilation. Spirituality doesn't get any better than this!
In effect this would be the same as me, a loving parent, telling my kids, either you love your daddy, or I will kill you and not in a good or easy way. Any parent that was reported to have said this to a child would be arrested and probably loose custody of the child. But not "God." of course. Now any real God would never have such a flawed "these are the rules of love" mentality and this is more a reflection of the human who thought it up as cute or threatening, depending on the desired effect. It's also hogwash.
The bible often gives rather Taliban-like solutions to loving ones children. Sometimes a "rod of correction" is advised to get rid of children being children. That has proven to be a real hit in modern child rearing results. Opps, nuther pun there! This rod is supposed to "drive it far from them." It can be used for anything from disobeying "god" to not agreeing with dad, even though dad is dead wrong, again. Of course it is a rule used to control and keep the tribe happy. Actually it makes them turn inward and resentful, or compliant until they have a chance to not be.
Why if we are lucky enough to live until Jesus comes again, we get to see that even He is coming with a great big Rod of Iron to bash his people and all people into submission. He rides a White Horse, no doubt, and pours out plagues, vials, trumpets and trombones upon the world until we all scream in pain, "Ok, OK, you win, we LOVE you." Is it impossible for these kinds of gods and offspring to set up seminars or classes on why, we as humans can do better and live lives more peaceful and meaningful? Bashing never seems to work. Are we forever going to be motivated by fear of a good bashing so we comply, or as I like to stay, "sit down on the outside, but stand up on the inside," and be duplistic? I guess so if we don't come up with another way to be and think.
We're even told in the Old Testament that as parents we should get up all our courage and stone to death our rebellious kids. Great idea! That's been a chosen winner in effective child rearing practices through all of human family history. Of course, no parents of those kids would not have gotten old enough to have them under those guidelines either, but that's another issue. What a great time the parents must have had actually getting to throw rocks at their own kids, and not just to scare them, but to kill them! You know how long it takes to be stoned to death? Long time.
Mom must have been beside herself with glee seeing the child beg for help only to have mom say "ha! You think that was a great hit, just watch this!" Maybe dad actually helped the mom get her shots more dead on as it's not the kind of thing most parents practice. Or who knows? Wonder if they went out for dinner that evening and discussed how they could have done it better and whether or not they will miss Schlomo. I wonder if dad kept a stone on the mantel and whenever any of the surviving kids goofed off, he gave it loving glance and gave the kid a knowing smile? Maybe child rearing classes in the Old Testament included a segment on "Effective Stoning Techniques Should the Need Arise."
Actually, a parent being required by religious law to stone their own child is beyond comprehension to me and certainly not a teaching any real god. No, these are pretty much made up gods with made up rules to instill fear. Definitely your "Love Jesus or Burn Forever in Hell," mentality. So please, don't stone your kids for being human and forget the rod of iron thing.
There is a lot of "love me or I will kill you," religion loose on the planet these days. Other forms of this ridiculous idea are "Obey Me, or I will kill you." "Believe me, or I will kill you." And perhaps, "Give Dad a big hug, or I will choke your guts out." All very effective and genuine expressions of a deep understanding of true love and compassion. Almost brings tears to my eyes thinking of how loved I am with this kind of love out there just waiting to pour itself down on me.
Well, at any rate, just kidding. "Love Jesus or burn forever in hell," is a pathetic statement of what is wrong with fundamentalist religious thinking. It's all fear, shame and guilt based. It's key motivator is fear of consequences if one does not comply, and it so often neither works nor inspires compassion or encouragement. I'd love to meet the kids of anyone that would paint on a huge barn roof, this little bit of sage Biblical advice. I wonder if they ever come home to the farm for Thanksgiving or Christmas, or dads birthday? I wonder if they even sends cards? I wonder if they are close to their parents or enjoy their company and perspectives on how life works and what to do when it doesn't seem to. Naw, I bet not. I bet these kids were stoned to death long ago.
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But where did Daddy bury the children? And can I rent the farm to film a zombie movie staring one of the risen righteous dead as mentioned in Matt. 27:52-53. What if the zombie has the power to raise the dead and uses it to bring the kiddies back. Would the kiddos be pissed Daddy had stoned them to death for not loving Jesus. Would they take revenge on Daddy? If so would that revenge take the form of burning perhaps at the stake?
The zombie movie on the love Jesus or burn in hell farm would, at least in my twisted and sick mind, have to start with some soft porn. Daddy (crotchity old gezzer in dirty overalls and raggedity faded red long johns with scragly beard, scars and wrinkles) banging hot young hooker. Just as Daddy is about to get a nut he goes religious whacko. "Do you love Jesus?" He shouts again and again as he loses his load. The Babe has to laugh or somehow seem to mock Jesus. Daddy then beats her. Lots of blood and pain like in Passion of the Christ. Then Daddy (Somehow a comparison of Daddy with Tertulian has to be worked into the scene.) Ties her to a post and stones her to death. Camera cuts to Daddy finishing up filling in the grave. He hears a car coming up the gravel driveway, so he walks about to see who would come out to visit him. Its the zombie. She looks like a hot young teenage hooker. Short mini skirt and tight sweater. Daddy likes. The zombie needs help with her car, so Daddy obliges. But it seems he can't fix the thing and the parts store is closed, so he offers Zombileena a place to stay the night. Over dinner, Daddy says something biblical. This sparks the memory sequence of how Zombileena arose in Jerusalem on passover eve to go for a walk about in town. Her memory trance is so deep she fails to notice Daddy. She and Daddy somehow have to end up in the sack. When sick sick Daddy is getting his nut, he goes into his 'do you love jesus' routine. But this time its him that gets the surprise. Zombileena is already dead and therefore she cant die. She forces Daddy to show her where the bodies are buried and to dig them up. She then does the supernatural thingy and raises the kiddies back to a living death. They then take revenge by burning Daddy at the stake while chanting "Do you love Jesus? Well Do You." Camera cuts to a close up of Daddy's face as he screams "Yes, Yess, I love Jesus". Then one of the zombies says "Thats too bad." and lights up the pile of fuel at the base of the post. (Somehow Daddy's own kid, a daughter needs to be borught into this nightmare. Perhaps she could be Daddy's first victim. The audience could be informed of this by a dream sequence or better the opening scenes of the movie. Yeah, Daddy likes to play with his little girl, but baby has a nasty streak of freethought. Daddy had to kill her for Jesus. That was how the thing got started.) I'm thinking its like the pig farmer in Canada who was caught recently after killing 49 hookers and drug addicts on his farm. He fed the bodies to the hogs. It would take a great deal of work to turn this idea into a movie script/screenplay but it would be fun. The idea of a psycho Christian serial killer/Porn/Zombie(Matt 27:53-53) movie intrigues me. This thing screams for a freethinker hero. Somehow, she would have to be the one to resolve the whole mess. Thats a problem. How to design a sellable plot device for introduction of her who saves the day and sends the zombies to their eternal rest.? Any ideas beyond "Bob is fracked in the head". Damn I wish I had'nt dropped all that Acid when I was young.
How about this. The freethought hero is a hitch hiker chick the zombie babe picks up on the road. Somehow zombileena knows she has to go to the "Do you love Jesus farm" and further that the hhc is the key to the whole thing. Maybe the movie is structured like Quinten Tarentino's flicks where we see similtaneous happenings in ramdom orders. The resurrection and Tertullian sequences would then be easier to introduce.
The heroine HHC could be handy with a flame thrower, and it just so happens
Daddy has a FT as a war souvenir. At the end when the zombies are chanting to burning Daddy, heroine HHC comes around the corner wth the FT and proceeds to light up their lives(deaths). Ok, so another sub plot is needed. This is too lame with out some gun slinggers. Got to work a group of guys packing heat into this thing. (How about the ole standby, a party bus breaks down on the road by the farm just at dark. Zombileena and heroine HHC are with the party people.)
more later
caseagainstfaith Grand Poster
Joined: Apr 21, 2003
Posts: 1972
Location: Houston, TX USA
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